Bite the Bullet

Alex is now down to his last two weeks of Basic Training!!

Thankfully, he passed his final PT test, and now - according to the Fort Benning website - he will be engaging in the most difficult training of all.  The list includes such things as:

• 36 - 48 Hour Continuous Operations (The Gauntlet) - I have no idea what that is, but it's such serious stuff that it warrants its own ominous nickname. 
• Battle March and Shoot
• Five-Mile Eagle Run  
• Foot March (12 miles)
• Honor Hill Cross Rifle Ceremony
• MK-19 Machine Gun Day & Night Familiarization Fire
• Seven-Day Field Training Exercise

Graduation is Wednesday, December 15, so I just don't see how it's possible to fit all of this in within the time allotted.  But this is the Army, so I'm sure they're being pushed to hunker down, bite the bullet, and git 'er done.
For the past three months, my nerves have been shot wondering, "How is he doing?  Are his lungs okay?  Did he pass his PT test?  Did he do well on his rifle qualification?"  I haven't been able to relax, and I won't really do so until I pin the Blue Infantry Cord on his uniform.  Then I can relax.

Kinda.

Okay, not really.

I worry that he will come home, settle into work and school, and suddenly get deployed overseas (God forbid, to Afghanistan).  I realize now that Basic Training is the easy part.  The National Guard is an 8-year commitment.  I have no idea where it will take him; I just have to have faith that he's been trained by the best Army in the world and that he'll be prepared for anything.

He got a 48-hour pass over Thanksgiving, so his dad went down to see him.  He reported back to me that Alex has an increased confidence and a solid life plan in place.  Chalie said Alex is "beaming with pride and ready for the world."  Just when that begins to make me feel better, my Mommy self kicks in and once again... I worry.

So I have come to the realization that I will worry forever - it's in my nature.  It's in the nature of all mothers.  At the same time, however, I need to let go.

Guess it's time for me to bite the bullet as well.